this starkid is goin' back to hogwarts

I Should Move On {Sebastian/Blaine}

I never ever ship Seblaine unless it’s siblings but hanakimicali’s video gave me all these feels and this just slipped out. (Does not directly follow Series 3, possible spoilers)

It started off as a game to Sebastian. He had heard so much about that Warbler and there he was standing in the door way while the Warblers practiced a number that they might possibly use for their sectionals competition in a few weeks’ time. The dapper young man had certainly caught Sebastian’s eye, the smooth face and the slicked hair and the almost nerdy clothes that made him look sexy as fuck.

But this was all too good of an opportunity for Sebastian, he loved playing games, he would reel them in, have his was, then drop them at the last moment.

All of the older Warblers such as David and Wes and Jeff had told Sebastian all about Blaine when he had transferred in at the beginning of the year. All of the stories about Blaine’s talent and then of course why he had transferred from Dalton to McKinley in the first place, the one little word that made this game even better than all of the others for Sebastian.

That one word was Kurt.

Then Blaine did something that meant Sebastian would never forget their first meeting; Blaine smiled at him. It was a small smile but a genuine one. As if he was honestly happy to see him, to see a new Warbler.

There was something different about Blaine, Sebastian decided. He had never seen someone be as genuinely pleased to see a new face in an old crowed as Blaine did right then. The Warblers had of course told Sebastian how gentlemanly Blaine was, to both boys and girl, but Sebastian had never expected this. He had all but taken Blaine’s place in the Warblers the second Blaine was gone, but this didn’t seem to bother him at all. If it had been the other way around, even though he had decided to leave off on his own terms, it still would have meant a fight.

But that was the difference between Sebastian and the rest of the world, he had to try so hard to prove himself, always had to be a step ahead of everyone else, and that was the exact reason he needed these games, and he always had to win.

He had spent so long trying to prove himself to his father, to prove he was still the man his father had always wanted him to be, that is was now overshadowing every other part of his life. He was twisted because his father’s expectations meant more to him than anything else; he needed his father’s approval like he needed oxygen to live.

Blaine would be a challenge, Sebastian knew that, but he wasn’t going to let this opportunity slide. The most revered Warbler would fall to his knees before him. What Sebastian wouldn’t do wasn’t worth knowing.

Once Warbler practice was over Sebastian took Blaine for coffee in Dalton’s own cafeteria. He would remind Blaine how much Dalton had meant to him. Sebastian had heard rumor Blaine had transferred to escape bullies at his old public school and he would play on that. Play on the fact this had been Blaine’s safe haven and he was now back in public school with the bully’s.

Sebastian used his charm on Blaine, the charm was always the first step “I don’t know who this Blaine guy is but apparently he’s sex on a stick and sings like a dream.” He told the dark haired boy. Who cares which of the Warblers apparently told him this, hopefully Blaine wouldn’t ask because Sebastian certainly hadn’t thought that far ahead, but the compliment was little more than cheap and easy but it seemed to work Blaine the right way. The shorter boy was blushing and waving it away, he was certainly the easy target. Or maybe this boyfriend of his Kurt just didn’t compliment him enough. Well that was all about to change because Sebastian had enough tricks up his sleeve to become a magician.

“You know Blaine, the Warblers will always be here for you, the old and the new” he said the last word with a glittering smile, not a fake one of course, but it was dazzling and would leave Blaine putty in his hands. “Once a Warbler, always a Warbler” he added warmly, reaching his hand to cover Blaine’s that was resting on the table. Their touch lingered for a moment, heat radiating between the two men’s bodies. And then the heat was gone and Blaine was folding his hands into his lap.

“I have a boyfriend, Sebastian” Blaine said quietly, looking down, suddenly rather too interested in his hands.

“Oh I know that Blaine” Sebastian replied with a smile once more, a smile that was on the edge of tipping over the edge and becoming a smirk but he held it back. Blaine would never see that, not until it was too late.

Sebastian could see the uncertainty in Blaine’s eyes for the rest of their conversation. The whole school could probably hear the internal battle that Sebastian knew was going on inside of Blaine’s head. The ex-Warbler would be thinking of a thousand ways to justify this to his little boyfriend, and from what Sebastian knew of Blaine’s personality, probably to himself too. He would be feeling guilty because Sebastian was hitting on him but knowing he wasn’t flirting back. Sebastian loved to watch his pray squirm.

Once their coffee was finished and Warbler talk was exhausted Sebastian and Blaine finally parted ways, promising another meeting soon. Sebastian was always one to hold onto his word and Blaine would be no different. Sebastian would bide his time of course, not to seem too desperate but his interests would be clear. Sebastian planned to forget Blaine for a weeks until the McKinley performance of West Side Story, but nothing could get Blaine from his head, not even his well-timed distractions. It was amazing really, how easy it was to leave the boarding school on a night.

Sebastian couldn’t get out of his head how genuine Blaine had been, why was he so hung up on this? All of his pray could be split into two categories; 1) totally oblivious and taken along for the ride, or 2) knew the game and played along. But Blaine was different, he appeared to see the game, but he wasn’t playing along, it was as if he were playing to a different set of rules and this bothered Sebastian. It seemed as if Blaine were falling into category number two but every time Sebastian made this conclusion he was reminded of that wholly genuine smile, his kind words, and looks of… affection?

This bugged Sebastian night and day.

He had never met anyone who appeared to care.

This was a whole new game.

Sebastian couldn’t keep away any longer, the more he thought of Blaine, the deeper in he fell. He could feel himself falling. He didn’t know where this dark tunnel led but all he wanted to do was reach the end, and seeing Blaine again seemed the only way to do that. Sebastian sent one simple text.

(10:40) Coffee? –S

(10:47) Sure –B

(10:48) Lima Bean 11:30? –S

(10:49) Okay –B

Sebastian arrived at the coffee shop he knew that Blaine and Kurt frequented, and took a table near the back, a shady corner where they could talk in private. The images of the one other time he had ever seen Blaine passed through his mind like an old movie, the clips fitting together messily, with no soundtrack. Sebastian’s eyes kept flickering between the door and the empty seat in front of him, hoping Blaine would actually turn up. In a way he had been surprised Blaine had actually agreed to this meeting, yes it was a Saturday so no school but that little boyfriend was causing a lot less problems than Sebastian originally thought he would.

There he was, the handsomely dapper young man was striding towards Sebastian with a grin plastered across his face. He looked genuinely happy to see Sebastian and that made the blond boy’s stomach flip. Well that was new. Sebastian smiled and indicated Blaine to sit down in the seat opposite him, pushing a still warm medium drip towards the dark haired boy with a smile. He had of course taken a mental note of what the other boy had drank on their last meeting. These small details meant a lot to people he had learned over the years.

The two boys started with mundane conversation about day to day happenings at their respective schools but this gave Sebastian the perfect opening to discuss the Warblers and how much they all missed Blaine and how Sebastian himself wished he had gotten a chance to perform with the amazing Blaine Anderson himself. As per their last conversation Blaine waved off the compliments all too quickly, appearing embarrassed.

But soon the conversation changed direction and they were talking not about Blaine’s reason for leaving, but instead his reason for enrolling at Dalton in the first case. Blaine explained his story about the Sadie Hawkins dance and how unaccepting his father was. Blaine even expressed a little bitterness at how accepting Kurt’s father appeared to be over his son’s sexuality. This gave Sebastian the perfect opening, and he couldn’t help but smirk inwardly, imagining the look on his father’s face if he knew that his hatred for his sons “lifestyle choices” was helping him get a guy.

Sebastian shared his own story of how his father had such high expectations of his son, how he expected him to become a top lawyer and had even moved from Iowa after leaving Paris just so that Sebastian could attend Dalton which apparently had the best reputation for private education that North America could provide, though Sebastian shared how he secretly doubted this reputation and believed the only reason they moved was because their friends and neighbours had heard about Sebastian’s sexuality and his father was ashamed.

The two boys found they could confide in each other over their parents’ disapproval and anger and hatred of what the adults considered a “choice”. Blaine expressed his inability to talk to Kurt on this matter as his father always tried his best to support his son and Blaine conveyed his thankfulness of having Sebastian to confide in about the mater.

A part of Sebastian almost felt sorry that Blaine couldn’t talk to his boyfriend about this, but this thought was quickly overshadowed by the reminder this was one more thing that would push Blaine into his waiting arms.

Then it was over all too quickly for Sebastian as Blaine checked the time and stammered that he had to go to and meet Kurt as they were going shopping in the afternoon. Sebastian swore he saw a look of sadness flicker in Blaine’s eyes when he said goodbye to the blond boy, but it was probably just a case of wishful thinking and the artificial lighting he argued with himself.

Even after Blaine had left Sebastian didn’t leave the Lima Bean for another hour, just thinking about the conversation he had just partaken in and the exchange of glances the two boys had shared, and the flipping in his stomach that would just not go away.

The next week was opening night of West Side Story and on the Monday Sebastian found himself at the Lima Bean once more. This time he was alone. His thoughts about Blaine had only worsened since their last meeting, he had hoped it would help him get out of this black hole he was falling into but the meeting had caused quite the opposite effect, he felt like he was in limbo and was fighting to get to one side or the other, and by now he was so desperate to escape he no longer cared which side he ended up on. Sebastian would lie awake in his dormitory watching the shadows flicker on the celling in his room, occasionally a small tear would escape and he would stop breathing until his sight was crystal clear once more.

Sebastian sat and allowed these thoughts to occupy his brain for a long while until a familiar face enters the coffee shop. Sebastian watches Blaine for a while, the boy on his arm obviously Kurt from the way the two are talking animatedly. Sebastian could see the way Blaine looked at Kurt; it was as if the slightly taller boy was the only person in the room, the only person in the universe. For once in his life Sebastian felt something that could even be jealousy. Why couldn’t Blaine look at him like that? But then Blaine’s eyes fell onto Sebastian and through the darkness Sebastian felt a little bit of light. There was a smile on Blaine’s face and he watched Blaine touch Kurt’s arm, whisper something in Kurt’s ear then walked over and pulled up a chair opposite Sebastian.

“That’s my boyfriend Kurt, Sebastian. He’s really, really amazing” Blaine said with a warm smile but a hint of something unrecognisable in his eyes. Sebastian never felt unsure but here he was.

“Who’s amazing?” Cut in a higher musical voice. Sebastian and Blaine both broke eye contact and looked up at the same time. “You are” answered Blaine softly as Kurt pulled up a seat and wrapped his arm around Blaine’s.

“Kurt this is Sebastian” Blaine introduced, not taking his eyes from Kurt’s face which was now locked on Sebastian’s, “he is the newest edition to the Warblers” Blaine added as an after though. Kurt gave Sebastian a seething look before returning his gaze to Blaine’s intense hazel eyes.

Eventually Sebastian broke the silence and asked Kurt about his own experience with the Warblers for his short stay at Dalton and this got Kurt gushing instantly, which in some ways Sebastian was glad about as it meant he had to contribute very little to their conversation, but on the other hand he regretted this decision as it meant he had to listen to Kurt’s stories about how amazing Blaine was, constantly reminding him Blaine wasn’t his.

“You know what guys, we should all go down to Scandals some time” Sebastian cut over Kurt’s nonsense ramblings about the difference between McKinley’s New Directions and The Warblers.

Blaine looked uneasy and Kurt appeared confused. “Scandals is the local gay bar Kurt” Blaine answered Kurt’s unasked question. “I don’t think that’s a very good idea” Blaine added turning back to Sebastian.

“Well, just have a think about it. I have to shoot now, Warblers practice. Let me know guys” Sebastian said, sounding more confident than he felt with his stomach in knots as exited the coffee shop.

It was eventually the night of West Side Story and the Warblers were attending in full uniform of course, united under one goal. Blaine. But the other Warblers motives were rather different than those of Sebastian. The Warblers wanted to show Blaine he still had friends at Dalton; that just because he left didn’t mean he lost those who had always supported him. But Sebastian used it to show Blaine where he really belonged, at Dalton, with him. And hell it didn’t hurt that Sebastian knew he looked hot as hell in that Blazer.

Sebastian sat as close to the stage as the block of Warblers seats would allow, watching and hoping Blaine would notice him. Sebastian wasn’t used to feeling this desperate to gain another boys attention, this was a feeling reserved for impressing his father. But this was different, he wanted to impress Blaine because he actually cared what the other boy thought of him, not to prove his father wrong or stand up to him. All these feelings and ideas spinning around Sebastian’s head since he first met Blaine were completely new; he didn’t know what to do with them.

Sebastian watched the whole show in silence, not joining in with the other Warblers friendly jeers but gave Blaine a standing ovation like the rest of the auditorium. As soon as the performance ended Sebastian was on his feet faster than any of the others, and he ran, faster than he had ever run before. Sebastian pushed open the toilet door and leaned on the sink, hands gripping the edges, trying to stop his body convulsing as the tears poured from his face.

Why was Blaine’s performance affecting him like this? What happened to the cool and confident Sebastian who played the game and then moved on? Why had he been unable to unlock his eyes from Blaine’s perfect honey orbs the entire night?

Sebastian had no idea how long he stood there but soon the noise of people exiting the auditorium down the hall began to fade into silence, broken only by the excited voices of the performers discussing how their opening night had gone. Sebastian took this as a sign it was safe for him to leave and so he took one quick glance in the mirror before exiting the bathroom slowly and making his way back to the stage. He walked in through the stage door this time and up onto the stage, eyes shut, and did not open them until he stepped out onto the stage where Blaine had stood not long ago.

As Sebastian opened his eyes he did not expect the sight that greeted his green orbs. Blaine was centre stage, moving graceful, apparently practicing a dace move, one Sebastian recalled from the performance. “Kurt?” came Blaine’s soft voice…

TBC…

(cliff-hanger, see previous post for more info)

Link to part two!  http://thisstarkidisgoinbacktohogwarts.tumblr.com/post/16827925893/i-should-move-on-sebastian-blaine-part-2

The video by hanakimicali http://hanakimicali.tumblr.com/post/16755625563/i-should-move-on-sebastian-blaine-i-dont-know